'Til 2011!

Honestly speaking, I know sex is good, sex is great, sex is amazing! But every now and then, I just love jacking off by myself. Laying down in the bed, one hand jerking, the other hand playing w/my nipples or grabbing at the sheets. Playing with my balls a lil bit while tickling my scrotum. I’ve never been much of a fingerer, but I kinda do like a bit of ass play around the rim; just a teeensssyy bit. I like to see how long I can hold out; see how horribly terrific it feels to get right to the very edge of busting a nut—and letting go of my dick so I won’t come. FUCK! I be looking at my dick like “you better not cum! You better not cum”! lol, I know it must be like “damn nigga, you beating me like I owe you money”. Lmao!!

And when I’m feeling extra kinky, once I finally do cum, I usually bust all over my stomach. I like to take the cum and rub it down on my balls and I can usually work out that “one extra nut” that you know is left in you, you know? Or sometimes after I bust, I’ll take the cum and use it as lube and (very lightly) play with my hole a lil bit. Okay, yall know, after all this time, that when it comes to a level of full-blown freakiness, I’m at the top of the list. What can I say? I’m just very sexually charged… and it’s not like I don’t get my fair share of dick, because I surely do, but sometimes, I kinda like to do it by myself.

It’s EXTREMELY hot when another dude decides to jack off with me. We race to see who can hold out the longest. Whoever comes first has to help the other guy cum. So I guess nobody really loses ;) You ought to try it sometime, it’ beats playing Monopoly!

Sidenote: the new year approaches and I can't help but thank God for seeing all of us this far, thanks Big Guy!  

Other than that… I posted a helluva lot of pics tonight because I won’t be making another post until after the New Year. So around Jan. 2^nd or so I think is when I’ll post again; these pics should tie you over though!  If you see any re-posts, it's just because it's one of my fav's or I busted to it before I posted... 

Enjoy the pics!

           

These next few pics are from Biron, a photographer who hit me up and sent me these pics from a private photoshoot. The model’s name is “Mebinchi” and I must say DAAAAMMNN!!!! Ain’t he fine, yall? Thanks to Biron for the pics and don’t forget, if you want your pics to be featured in a post, just send them to my email CAPRICORNARIES@HOTMAIL.COM  And as sure as the sky is blue, I’ll post your pics!

'Til 2011, I love yall and thanks for loving my freaky azz!!!! 

btw, don't wait for 2011 to start a new year's resolution, start NOW!!!! 

--Cogito

Fuck it, just fuck!

Have you ever felt bad because you DON'T feel bad about something? Lately, I haven't been "pressed" to please people; I'm not spazzing out from trying (and/or failing) to meet expectations.

I'm usually the "go-to" guy that you know will be there, rain or shine, if you need him. Sure I'll babysit, sure I'll fill in at the LAST minute and host the poetry show, sure I'll put my entire life on pause so we can chat on the phone for 2 hours about why your DUMB ASS still loves him and you know he does you wrong. Could it be that I'm too available for people? Too accessible? Too dependable? Wait, aren't those supposed to be GOOD qualities? I promise, some of my greatest character flaws are my positives: my kindness, my heart, my... WALLET, my time, my talent, etc.

For about a month or so now, it's like things that used to get me pissed or rub me the wrong way--they don't shake me anymore. Negroes w/ SMART ASS comments aren't worth my verbal communication. I can not care less about what someone's opinion/expectation is of me, and believe you me, I've checked and no--I literally can not care any less about it!

And now that I'm pretty much treating everyone around me like how they treat me, they all ask those "What's wrong with [Cogito]? Why is he acting all funny and antisocial" kind of questions. It's cuz I don't want to FUCKING talk to you, that's why. So no, unlock the doors of the church yall DAMN selves, I'm not even going to ask for a copy of the new key. Have my brother's TRIFLING ass babysit my nephew, hell, he's the daddy! Omg, T-Mobile don't play about these minutes, I'll save us both 2 hours of our lives we cant get back: Bitch, BREAK UP WITH HIM! No [club owner of whom's brains I want to fuck out of their skull] I don't care if I'm only hosting your shows b/c I'm really trying to get some action w/u,--call me 2 days in advance from now on or NO, I can't host the show (unless you're gonna finally put-out ofcourse!) lol.


Could it be due to a lack of reciprocity? Not that it's what I'm asking for, but it would be nice. Seriously, I hope you all have read enough about me by now to know that I'm a pretty respectful guy. I really put in effort to treat everyone with the respect they deserve, and the respect I want in return. But at this point, I'm not asking for reciprocity, respect, appreciation, or none of the other accolades: I just want people to leave me the FUCK alone.

Last time I checked, I had hair on both of my balls so I know I'm a GROWN ASS MAN. If I want to do something, I'll do it. If not, shut the FUCK up and move on. I promise the world isn't going to spinning because I'm late for church; I'm sure God still loves me. World Hunger is still going to ravish the world, whether I babysit my lovable nephew or not. I promise, if you two break up right now, he's gonna have another bitch on the phone before he can get his clothes out of your closet.

...sorry if I sound harsh, I just really needed a place to vent and I thought "hhmmm... I'll lure them in w/some hot ass pics, and then hook 'em with my rants!!!!" My diabolical plan worked! lmao! But really though, I AM NOTHING BUT THE MONSTER THESE MUTHAFUCKAZ HAVE MADE ME OUT TO BE. I don't even curse this much in real life, but it feels sooooo much better typing FUCK in capitol letters, idky...

And on top of all of that, I don't feel the least bit remorseful for how I feel or what I say. Fuck it, just fuck.

Enjoy the pics and thanks for reading my rant! Excuse the typos...

As We Lay...

I was 16, he was 29, he was a coworker of my dad—we met one year when my dad threw a party for the Kentucky Derby (for those who don't know, the Derby is like Mardi Gras for us Louisville people). And in Kentucky especially, age aint nothin’ but a number, so the age gap didn’t make a difference. He was fine, I was young, and we were both horny.

                …I was the first to wake up, that morning, years ago. Being held in his arms tight, but loose enough to let me know that if I had to leave, it would be okay. But if felt so good to be held, not that the sex wasn’t amazing, because it was, but being held was a spiritual reminder that after my brains are done being fucked outside of my skull, he cared enough about the rest of my body to hold it for a while. My senses were buzzing: the smell of Old Spice bodywash clinging to our skin; the taste of skin, salty from sweat worked up by passion; how it felt when I ran my fingers down his abs, felt like yellow-brick roads on my fingers leading down to the Wizard of Oz—and no, unlike the movie, his Wizard was just as big behind the curtain as it appeared to be! The deep baritone of his voice has been stuck in my head like the love songs we played on repeat.

                And damn, the way he could make his tongue flat as he ate me out—it felt so good it brought tears to my eyes. And I would try and scoot up in the bed and he’d grab my arms and pull me back down onto his tongue—FUCK! He had this magic power over me and he knew it. We took our time with it and I can honestly say he was the first of only a few guys that I never got bored with having sex. It was always something new everytime: first on the bed, let’s try it standing up, let’s do it in the shower, let’s just 69 for a while, etc.

                …me being young, I didn’t care that he had a girl with a child on the way, I was hypnotized by his dick and that’s all I needed to make my world spin. Now that I’m older, I look back at how dangerous it all really was: his girl only worked 5 minutes away from his place and she had a key to his door—she could have walked in at any minute. Everytime the phone rang he would jump up and answer it, telling me to keep quiet, or he’d tell me to put my face in the pillow to muffle my moans. But the way we fucked, I tried to leave my scent on him; leave my scent in his bed sheets, on his clothes, scratch his back, anything to let that bitch know she wasn’t the only one. He had some good dick, a great job, a banging personality, and I wanted to be in her position—so “fuck dat bitch” was my mindset.

                But I was only ever good enough for a few nuts and that was it; I was so stupid, I wish I could tell my younger self of how things would turn out: when she finally had the baby, he decided to get serious with her, and I and he would be no more. We still keep in touch through the magic of Facebook; they got married and are expecting their FOURTH child together. Now that I’m older, I have no hard feelings, we had a “thing” that was never to be anything but.

…I said all that to say this…

                For spring break, I’m going back down to Kentucky to visit my family and also to handle some business in church, I let him know this on facebook and he tells me that he would love for us to meet up and “catch up” with eachother. I know full well what he means by “catching up” and I’m veeerryyy tempted to say yes—if only to see if he’s as good as I remember. 

Yes I have a bf, of course it would be something that even he wouldn't know about, I just really want to see, now that I'm older and much more experienced, if it was just my 16 year old self being swindled by what I thought was some "good dick". 

What is a man to do?? Let me know your thoughts/opinions, this is really bothering me!! 

(enjoy the pics)

--Cogito