Friday, August 31, 2012

Gay Slang and

We've discussed my weakness for Fem Guys before. Like, on a scale from Clay Aiken to Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, I'm into a... Tyler Perry level of femininity.

Whatever. I like my guys w/a lil sugar in their tank. -_-

This post all started after I read this article on Fem vs. Masculine men on

I've always prided myself in being an advocate for the ambiguously gay male, being one myself. I'm too feminine to be considered masculine and too masculine to be considered feminine.

Because of that, and the fact that I've never really had a "gay" clique of friendships, I'm HELLA behind in gay-living. Especially when it comes to slang.

Gays have our own language. A language I still can't speak.

What does

"For the kids/children" mean?

What the hell is "Trade"?

What does it mean when you put "Boots" at the end of a phrase?

Um... "Throw Shade"?

What's the "T"?

I know what "Sickenin'" means, but what about "You bitches will GAG!"?

Does "Cunt" mean cute? As in "those shoes are so cunt!" ??

What about when someone's face is "beat"?

What is a "KiKi"?

One time, I was out doing Karaoke with some of my friends. The sassiest little gay guy you ever saw, was standing in front of me in line to request his Karaoke song. He turns to me and sees that I too am a sassafras, so he asks me "What broadway song should I request"?? And I'm like, "uh... All That Jazz?" lmao. Apparently all gays are into broadway music but me. -_-

And what's the deal with "Gay Houses" like the House of Chanel or the House of Revlon? If I wanted to join, would I have to like, fill out an application or something?

(Plus, what are some other gay terms?)

Enjoy the pics!

Thursday, August 23, 2012


It started back in Middle School. Anthony was one of my closest friends in 7th grade. We hung out, played Smash Brothers on the N64, always sat with each other on the school bus. All that fun stuff.

Now mind you, I didn't even know what "being gay" was back then. All I knew was that I had a pull towards boys and it felt natural, period. When I finally accepted those feelings, my world opened up and I wanted to explore them.

Idk what happened, but one day, it just suddenly clicked in my head that I was absolutely, positively, 100% IN LOVE WITH ANTHONY. To test the waters, I remember inching closer and closer to him on the school bus, just to see what he'd do. And to my surprise, he'd always make sure our legs were touching. Or when we'd share earbud-headphones, he'd always touch his face on mine. And that set my pre-teen hormones on FIRE!

This may sound weird, but he had a distinguishable scent to me. It wasn't an odor. It was like a natural scent that he had. I can still smell it to this day.

I was helplessly in love with that kid.

By 8th grade, everyone finally started growing hair on their balls and pimples started taking residence on our faces. Puberty was in full-effect. Girls were growing boobs, and guys were getting taller.

Puberty wasn't that nice to me. I got fatter. Blacker. My face looked like a pepperoni pizza, my voice STILL hadn't deepened, and to top it all off, I was getting into fights whenever someone called me a "sissy" or a "faggot".

But Anthony was still cool with me anyway. I needed his friendship so much, that I didn't risk losing him by making a pass at him.

In all honesty, if it wasn't for his friendship (and my 2 other friends), I doubt I would've survived middle school in one piece.

Fast-forward to High School.

First day of 9th grade, I was looking for where Anthony was sitting in the lunch room. (nobody had staked their territory in the cafeteria yet).

When I found him, I was about to sit down when he told me someone else was sitting there. I moved to the other seat, and he says to me

"Man, GON! You messin' up my reputation".

It still breaks my heart to think about it.

After that, things changed. We both found our "cliques" and that was that.

There was plenty of other eye-candies to concern myself with, so I just shrugged Anthony off and the rest, as they say, is history...

Now that I'm back in my hometown, I see him from time to time.

Actually, on College Nights, him and his homies come to Rob's club sometimes.

I was stopped at a red light on Patterson St. yesterday, and I saw him walk past my car.

I beeped my horn, he looked in the car, then came over and gave me some dap.

And dammit, he still smelled the same.

Its interesting to see how life turns out for people, ya know?

While I was busy training for my Minister's License, Anthony was in and out of jail and was even involved in a fight that resulted in murder. I could look at him and tell he'd been through the ringer.

Nowadays, he goes by the rapper name Nino Pachino (trust me, his raps are WAY cornier than his name)and I've heard several rumors that he's got some sugar in his tank. Whether its true or not, is irrelevant to me today.

I slipped him one of my business cards as the light turned green, thinking to myself:

" he's just somebody that I used to know..."

You know the rest.


Friday, August 17, 2012

Random Thoughts...

(ain't this negro GORGEOUS?)

I wish I could say something romantic.

Like whenever we make love, we hold each other close until we fall asleep, tangled up in each other.

But in reality, when I crash at Rob's house, he sleeps on the couch.

Because I always end up kicking him out of bed.


He says I do Kung Fu in my sleep. LBVS

I think Cyrus from SYTYCD Season 9 is hella cute.

I think Francois Sagat looks stupid with that stupid scalp tattoo.

I have a teensy lil white boy crush on Seth Rogen

I'm super excited for Azealia Banks' career.

and if were the least bit into pussy, Elle Varner could GET IT!

Well... I ain't talkin' bout nothin' important.

Enjoy the pics!